Interesting fact about America is it does not have an official language. Most people would say it is English, and German was almost chosen once. The problem that arises is America is so vast and contains so many different cultures it is difficult to pinpoint one language. The language I feel is the most widely spoken and understand by America, and the language I vote to be our official, is the language of the internet.
In the early days of instant messenger, the concern was that the acronyms and informal punctuation would destroy the English language. While I couldn’t agree with that more, I have to argue constructively that it in return has produced a language of its own so to speak. There are certain courtesies that must be abided on the internet and there is a plethora of symbols and saying that have developed their own meanings within the internet realm.
The period (.) is very dangerous over the internet. Contrasting its use at the end of every sentence in English, if a period is used to finish a sentence of three words or less, it could be taken offensively as a symbol for hate or anger. Along the same lines, the asterisk (*) is used to enclose words that are meant to suggest actions. For example, I waved and she didn’t see me *hides face in shame*. If an asterisk is only at the beginning of the word, though, this indicates a spelling correction. I don’t know how or why I know this, and everyone understands and accepts it, but these are rules of the internet language.
What is further interesting about the development of this internet language is its existence away from the world wide web and it’s entering into everyday vocabulary. The most infamous example of this would have to be “lol”. Originating as a short hand for “laugh out loud” this acronym is now widely used through speech as well as type to express laughter or amusement.
Internet language even goes so far as to create words to explain things that can’t possibly be explained. There is a particular internet word whose discovery I greatly respect and that word is “facepalm”. Everyone has done the facepalm but until now, I never knew how to explain it. Facepalm is the phenomenon of slapping your hand (palm) against your forehead (face) in response to a stupid mistake you just realized you made or dumb question that was just asked. I could try to explain it but I can’t, thus the wonder of the invention of facepalm.
The greatest example of invented words is pwn. It is a word derived I believe from a slang word, a second generation slang, when the original slang “own” was mispelled. Incredible when a typo can become a widely used insult, generally for gamers.
Where the internet language becomes particularly impressive is when it conveys emotions or types of jokes that canNOT exist outside of its realm. My two examples: fan pages on Facebook and hash tags on twitter.
Fan pages on F”acebook were meant for bands and such in the beginning so people could personalize their profiles more by showing what they liked, and they could connect with other people that like the same things. Fan pages have developed to be for abstract concepts or idiosyncrasies that by “becoming a fan” you display that you share that characteristic, state of mind, etc. For example, you could become a fan of “Pretending the floor is Lava”, “Realizing you Borrowed the Pen you are Chewing On”, or “Waiting for Someone to Say the Perfect Thing Because you have the Perfect Answer. These are things we can relate to but can’t really be portrayed as anything other than a fan page. Earlier, I wanting to put as my facebook status that “I hate when you have one headlight out, and start to notice all the other cars on the road that have only one light” because that happened to me. Somehow, for some reason, becoming a fan of that exactly thing would have been ten times funnier because the fan page shows just how many people in the world are also aggravates by this. Its like a world wide club that tells outsiders “you just wouldn’t understand, its a fan page thing.”
Hash tags (#) are similar. Their original purpose was to connect people on twitter who are discussing similar topics. If you are posting something about a web comic you wold put #webcomics in your tweet, and when people search for #webcomics, they will find all things web comic related. But NOW, hash tags have grown to serve as the internet sub-concious or the internet aside. And they are now used as a tool to enforce sarcasm on the internet, a dilemma we have all dreaded. You could tweet “Man, this marzipan is delicious” and the internet world would not know whether or not to take it seriously. To clarify, you could tweet “Man, this marzipan is delicious #iwouldratherbedoinganythingelsebuteatingthismarzipan. Keep it under 140 though, of course. The hash tag is an amazement to me. I love how it is used, and understood and I absolutely cannot wait for it to somehow cross over into the web-infested version of English. Maybe you guys could help start this! Say something sarcastic then follow it up by saying “Hash tag (whatever you really think).” Take that LOL, PWNED!
The difficulty in explaining things on the web that cannot be explained is just that…they cannot be explained. They are just understood, and that is the wonder of it. Its as close as telepathy as we will get I reckon. In some ways, our communicative abilities have been enhanced by the expansions of language through the internet. The age of formal writing is dying though and soon English will be like Latin – all word in the new language will have English roots but English itself will be dead. D-E-D dead.
You could say that these movies are “a fa fa fa fa fa fa fa fa fa better”
She rips holes into the sheet underneath the bed so she can tunnel through the boxspring.
5.That Soccer Mom in the Minivan Behind Me the Other Day – for attempting to do several other things while driving then getting annoyed and whipping around me when I had to turn. Put down the cell phone and the papers and pay attention.
